Sometimes faith feels like doubt…sometimes I wonder if we’ll ever get out ~ TFK

I dunno, something, I just kind of felt like writing and I listened to the song with the above lyrics in it earlier this week and it rang true besides I’ve been wanting to write something for a while now, (shortly after writing my last blog post actually which is pretty cool).  I’m not really doing much right now, working at my new job and on Christmas presents (Eeeep!!!!  Christmas!!!!) and thinking a lot.  Thinking about nothing and everything.

“Pardon me while I burn and rise above the flames” ~ Incubus.

Listening to a lot of music lately and finding things that resonate.

“I love the broken ones…maybe I see a part of me in them.  The missing piece always trying to fit in.  The shattered heart…” ~Dia.

Read an article the other day attempting to link suicide rates among the elderly to the cutting of funding to Medicaid.  I will reserve judgement because it seemed to me that there are a lot of factors involved and I don’t think it can be traced to one single thing.  The comments on the article saddened me though.  I should know better than to read those, they are almost always shitty, ignorant, heartless and just terrible.

“And in a burst of light that blinded every angel.  As if the sky had blown the heavens into stars.  You felt the gravity of tempered grace” ~Linkin Park.

The other day I saw a pine tree that had frost on one side but the other side didn’t because it was in the sun, it was really cool and I wish I could’ve gotten a picture but I was driving and that’s a no-no.  It has been really cold here the past few days; day before yesterday it didn’t get above 20 degrees even though the sun was shining and the sky was a clear blue.  *sigh* Winter…

“Like a phoenix I will rise again.” ~Pillar.

I’ve finally found a craft that I absolutely love – cross-stitching.  I know, I know cross-stitching that’s like something that little old ladies do right?  Whatever I don’t care, I love it.  It’s relatively easy and when you get done it’s so pretty.  I mean you go from a mess of cross-stitches, half stitches, quarter stitches, french knots and backstitches to a whole beautiful picture; it is amazing.  I’ll try to post some pictures of the things that I made the fam for Christmas after Christmas.  Feel free to remind me.

“…thoughts arrive like butterflies.  Oh, he don’t know, so he chases them away.” ~Pearl Jam.

So my new job is going well; I have discovered that I really like helping people.  Even if it’s something silly like finding someone the ‘perfect’ sweater to go with a pair of jeans I still get a thrill out of that look that people get when you’ve helped in some way.

” I would explode just to save your life.” ~Yellowcard.

You know it really bothers me when people do jackass things just because they don’t agree with a viewpoint.  I don’t agree with vegetarians or vegans, I don’t think I could live that lifestyle but I respect their choice and I don’t do stupid things like creating a FB group with a title about how “innocent vegetables are killed everyday by vegetarians, together we can do something to stop it” or posting pictures of some disgusting “Christmas” decorations that show the form of deer hanging upside down with red lights at it’s throat like it’s just been slaughtered.  That’s gross.  It turns my stomach and I love venison.  Just like I don’t agree with atheists but I don’t go around making fun of them and calling them names or try to shove my beliefs down their throat.  Is it so hard to show respect for another human being, even when you disagree with their choices or think they are totally and completely wrong and that you’d have to be stupid to believe what they believe.  Just because you think they’re stupid doesn’t give you the right to be insulting and a fucking jerk.  I’m so tired of people being rude and unfeeling and arrogant enough to believe that their opinion is the only one that matters; and for that matter isn’t an opinion because they are never wrong.  Ugh!

“You fall to your knees.  You beg, you plead.  Can I be somebody else for all the times I hate myself?” ~Skillet.

I was reading through one of my college papers today and I realized that I kind of miss being in school.  I don’t think I want to go back…it just reminded me how much I like intellectualism and being able to understand theories and esoteric writings.  It’s weird but I really do like it and I kind of miss it.

“Just stop for a minute and Smile.” ~ Jessie J

Soooo……there are only 16 days until Christmas!!!!  Happy, happy, joy, joy!!  :D

“It’s getting cold in here so fire it up!” ~ TFK

week in a flash (week 26)

1. Guess what?  I get to leave for Colorado tomorrow for Thanksgiving break!!!  Yaaaa!!!  Four whole days and one half-day in the great state of CO!!!!!  I get to see my parentals, my Uncle and his fam, my cat and the new Harry Potter movie!!  So excited!!!!!!!  Yaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2. This is from my PR book in the chapter about  writing ~ “Writing is easy,” said U.S. journalist and playwright Gene Fowler. “All you do is stare at a blank sheet of paper until drops of blood form on your forehead.”  (and a little later)  Nobel Prize-winning novelist Ernest Hemingway declared, “Writing is easy.  Just open a vein and bleed on paper.”  ~ I laughed at both of those quotations  :D

3. I thought my mom would enjoy this one – this is from my Twitter feed there was this little movement the other day where people would tweet something that they would have told their 16-yr-old self and this one came from someone who posts as Lord Voldemort from Harry Potter ~ Lord_Voldemort7 #tweetyour16yearoldself Choose Neville Longbottom! Choose Neville Longbottom!

4. I’ve been watching waaaaaay too many Westerns, the other night I dreamt that I was part of a cattle drive (the cattle were owned by my dad) and that I trained my own horse (she was beautiful though, I liked that part of it).  Wow.

5. I looked out my peephole the other morning and it took me a few minutes to realize that what I was seeing wasn’t the sun shining brightly but was in fact bright, white snow on the ground…damn snow (and winter) has arrived in SoDak.  That wasn’t so bad though because it was a light snowfall and was mostly gone by nightfall.  I’m hoping that any blizzard-type weather waits until I’m not living in the state anymore…

6. You know I might have been able to handle living away from the mountains of CO and farther away from family if it weren’t for the damn wind in this state, it’s unbelievable!

7. Days to graduation = 17

w/ weekends and holidays = 25

w/o holidays = 21, by the next week-in-a-flash this one won’t be necessary because the number will be the same as w/ weekends and holidays…hmmm…

8. Bored, excited, stressed, tired…I am so eager to just be done already.

9. I wonder if, sometimes, my strong reactions to things and my passions come off as bitchiness…*sigh* why is it so hard to talk to people about hot button issues without it dissolving into an argument?  I just don’t understand, I mean I understand being passionate about an issue and wanting to convey to people the reason for that passion but that doesn’t mean you have to dismiss someonelse’s viewpoint, does it?  That’s what I don’t understand, I don’t understand being so locked into an opinion that anytime someone raises an opposing view you are unable to proceed in the discussion and remain polite…I try, I really try to remain open-minded while still retaining my views and beliefs and I try to give other people’s views and opinions a fair shake but I also like, adore engaging in discussion and debate. I like it when people disagree with me, I like it when someone has a different point of view but dammit I don’t like it when people are so set in their ways and so locked in the status quo that they dismiss me out of hand.  I just wish that I could find a way to engage in discussion and debate with others that doesn’t end in an argument…that’s all.

10. The song and the video brought me to tears, so beautiful!

11. This was too awesome not to share, read and enjoy! http://thenoreaster.wordpress.com/2010/11/18/sunbeams-12/

12. I have a professor who can’t remember my name in class but when I pass this professor in the hallways they call me by name and say hi..wierd, maybe there’s some sort of memory vortex in the classroom…

13. Yesterday I looked outside and it was…well, I guess it depends on how much you like snow, it was either a winter wonderland or an arctic tundra.  I prefer arctic tundra.  (btw #5 happened either Wednesday or Thursday of last week, completely unrelated).